- Anti Joke

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

Manchester City

If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

* anti-punchline

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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