Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

justin beiber sucks

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops