What's red and silly? A blood clot

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

A fish walks into a bar

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

kennah campion... being nice

A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

Why did the doctor wear glasses? Because he was a whale.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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