Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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CHEEZECAKE

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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son, you're adopted.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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Carlton

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

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Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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