why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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