How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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why was the boy crying over his dog, his cat, and his bird? Cuz i raped them Wat about his pet hamster? I threw it at a wall

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops