why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

Yo mamas so fat she is obese

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...