Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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