Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops