Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A black man checks his watch. He sees that its 3:50, and calmly carries on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What does bigfoot have? Big feet.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My jeans

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

penis in the camel

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what you get time to go with? - a clock

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops