Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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Knock Knock whos there? Semore Frickelson Semore Frickelson Who? What other Semore Frickelson do you know!? Let me in its freezing out here!

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops