What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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