What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

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9/11 my birthday

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a man dropped a bar of soap in the shower. He immediately picked it up and finished washing himself. He then got dressed and left the gym.

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What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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