there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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PICKLES

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

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Why is Brendan stupid. Because he's mentally retarded due to the fact he was dropped as a chil.d

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Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

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What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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I completely thought you where bullshitting me, how come I never noticed before? How and why?

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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