Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Knock Knock.

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you tell your friend who has been cheating on his wife? You're a terrible human being, and she deserves better!

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops