Why did the chicken cross the road? because

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a lamp?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

thumb_up thumb_down +22

hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +20

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops