what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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noodles

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What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What's the difference between people with aids and people with cancer? People with cancer can get into heaven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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