What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Roses are yellow Daisies are purple Tv drinks yes Why swing the door

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25

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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knock knock who's there ?

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I love alchohol!

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

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why is cancer a big thing because its bad

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A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Call me Ishmael. Or don't. Well, you can, but I'm not forcing you. You could call me Steve or Bob, it's not really that important. I'm just around here anyway to tell about a huge white dick. A whale dick. A SPERM whale dick. Never mind. Or the guy whose obsessed with it. No, it's not what it sounds like. He just wants to stab it with his harpoon. Wait, that sounds even worse. Whatever. Anyway, call me Ishmael...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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