Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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The awkward when you said moment in your head.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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A man is on anti jokes, he is not laughing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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