when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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why does the room smell bad? because there's a dead body under the bed

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

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my penis

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops