What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

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Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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