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why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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