What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

Ha ha. You've wasted your life, sucker!

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

Why do black people play basketball? Because they can join their friends in playing an extremely fun and calorie-burning sport.

Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

What does the average fishermen catch Fish

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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