What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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