What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

Why was the mexican ugly? -UR MOM!

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

What is the difference between Jason Voorhees and Michael Myers? One's name is Jason, and the other's name is Michael.

Laura Pratz..

y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? the pizza wont scream when you put it in the oven.....

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

I am the sun. You are the moon.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

Yo mama so dumb, she studied for a blood test.

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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