Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

She Explored My Body, Licked, Sucked, Swallowed! When Satisfied, She Left! . . . . Damn Mosquito!!!

A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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