A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

someone called someone else a frog

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...