What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 pounds. My girlfriend was a fatass. Wasn't gonna make that mistake again when I found a woman to marry.

How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

A dog is always in the pushup position.

what is funnier than 24.....?????? 69. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. IT IS FUNNY BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE ME AND YOUR MAMA

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

you see theres this guy.

"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

The Ohio State Buckeyes

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

What's 2+2? Fish

Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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