How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Friend's are like penguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

jess always squints her eyes when making a point

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops