What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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what did one dog say to another dog? ....nothing, because they can only bark.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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