Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

My dog barks when someones at the door.

4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

Ok class, we are doing arts and crafts today, but remember, have fun and be creative... Thats what she said

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

A woman walks into a bar.

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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