A moth walks into a podiatrist's office. The podiatrist says, "Moth, what's the problem?" And the moth says, "What's the problem. Well, doc, where do I begin? Every day I get up to another cruel sky. It's like the sun is mocking me as I begin the gruelling preparations for another 8-hours of slogging in meaningless toil for my boss, Gregor McIvanichisky. A grey self, captive in a grey cubicle in a grey office with no windows that I might see the grey clouds beyond... I just sit in my cubicle as I feel the throbbing ache of the best days of my life being raped away into a monotonous, forgettable slurry of irrelevant corporate drudgery. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't think my boss even knows. All he knows is that he has power over me. And my children...my daughter is always on her cellphone, texting and emailing. I haven't spoken real words to her in weeks. My oldest son is never home and when he is, he's locked in his room listening to angry music. My youngest son, he's only 4, I look at him and he asks me to play... and I feel nothing. No love, no tenderness... just a void. And when I look in the mirror...I don't recognize the face staring back at me. It's aged so much from the boyish looks I remember. The years have carved deep lines of despair, worry and anguish. Dark, hollow eyes where once gleamed hope and excitement. Thin lips unable to find the smile of the happy, old days. If only I could find the courage to reach over to the side table and remove the loaded gun. And then find the strength to pull back that hammer as the chamber rotates, clicking solidly into place...Raising it to my temple for the final squeeze that will erase the last shreds of my existence from this cold grave of a life wasted away." And the podiatrist says, "Well, Moth, you're in pretty rough shape. You need to get some help. But why did you come to me? You need a psychiatrist!!" And the moth says... "Because the light was on."

In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

France never surrender.

What's funnier than 24? 25

What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

Q: What Jews are doing in Palestine? A: Living.

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

An Amish walks into Best Buy

Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

62

I can't see my forehead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...