Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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