Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Sometimes black people kill other black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Fine, ladies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the man say to the jew? How are jew?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Golf.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the racist southerner say to the snide lawyer? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops