Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

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so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops