What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

An Amish walks into Best Buy

Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

You're on fire.

So a seal walks into a club...

Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

Why can black people jump shoot and steal? Because society’s stereotypes have influenced people in thinking that African Americans can jump really high, shoot a basketball well and commit theft.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

to see a bad joke look above

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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