How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

Why was the kindergartener crying in the corner? His family was poor and his father abused him.

Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...