Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? Because they kept saying Bach bach Bach. No. Beethoven was deaf. He couldnt understand what they were saying.

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A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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Why was the 7 year old girl crying? Because its hard to laugh during gang rape.

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A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

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roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

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What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

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Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

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Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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How does a black man laugh? He schuckles

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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