A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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You sick fiend

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

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An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Who had an average-sized penis he only used during monogamous sex with his spouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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