How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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