How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

A man walked into a bar. I shot him

There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

Why didn't John get a present for Christmas? Because John died eight months ago.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

have you seen Stevie wonders car? No Neither has he

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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