A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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what is the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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It got hit by a rocket.

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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