A Duck walks into a bar.

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If life gives you lemonade.

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a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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