Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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What happened to the twins? 9/11

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How do you make a Hispanic man sad? Answer: steal everything he has until he has nothing

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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I like that, but why am I happy?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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one stop shop

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What Did The Hobo Get For Christmas? A Welcome Home Mat.

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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