What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

Whats funnier than Steven Yuhasz being Straight? Womens Rights.

I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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