what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

thumb_up thumb_down

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

thumb_up thumb_down

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

thumb_up thumb_down

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

thumb_up thumb_down

If life gives you lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

thumb_up thumb_down

I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

thumb_up thumb_down

A Duck walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

thumb_up thumb_down

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

thumb_up thumb_down

ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops