Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Women's Rights

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Asians...

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

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whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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French people.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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What Is somthing that is 5 "5" and white A 5 "5" white person

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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Female Athletics

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Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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