roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

What did the mentally disabled child say to the snowman? Mnnghhhmuhmuhhu ooh ooh ooh!

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

A white man walks into a bar. Then he gets a beer.

What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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