I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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did you stub your toe?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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