What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

The duck didn't cross the road.

Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

PENIS that is all

whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

But who would want to sell us out and why?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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